Groom Mate Platinum XL

Okay, this is probably not a topic for polite conversation, but today I'm talking about nose hair. As adults, we have nose hair. It acts as a filter to keep unwanted stuff out of our nose, and by extension out of the rest of our body. Who needs to walk around wearing a surgical mask when you have NOSE HAIR!?! Nature's original mask/filter!

In fact, many doctors recommend not trimming your nose hair at all. Y'know, for your health and stuff? But the thing is, it's really not very ladylike to walk around with visible nose hair. In fact, it's really not very gentlemanlike, either. So, because it is soooooo important to me that people not look at me like I am some kind of freak to be ladylike, I have been trimming my nose hair ever since it first appeared quite a few years ago with a pair of pointy little scissors...



Probably not the safest way to trim the hair in your nose, sticking a little pair of pointy scissors up your nose, but I sustained no injuries this way over the years and that's what I did.

At least it was until I misplaced my dangerous little spears of nose-doom. That's when I thought "hey, I'll get a nose hair trimmer!" So that's when I read a bunch of reviews on Amazon and ended up ordering a Groom Mate Platinum XL. It trims ear hair, too...something I don't have, but if I ever do, I'm ready!

It was a little scary putting this contraption up my nose and twisting it, but it didn't hurt at all. In fact, I liked it much better than my stabby mcstab scissors. I wasn't sure what the "XL" in the name meant, but when it arrived in the mail I found it fit in my not-XL nostrils just fine. Oh happy day!

Then, a few days later, I opened my mailbox and found...another Groom Mate Platinum XL! Ermmm...that was odd. I checked PayPal and Amazon and it looked like I ordered a second one. Nooooo! But I didn't!!!!! What do I need two for??? I swear I didn't!

So yesterday, I opened my mailbox and found...TWO MORE Groom Mate Platinum XL nose hair trimmers.

What...

the...

hell?????

I have FOUR nose hair trimmers (so far) and Amazon says I placed four orders. I'm drowning in nose hair trimmers here.

I was about to contact Amazon and say "What the hell is going on????" I order quite a lot of stuff from Amazon and nothing like this has happened before. This was from a third party seller but still...

But just before freaking out, I figured out what happened...

I use Firefox for my browser and I usually have oh, about ten pages open at once. That's fine but after a while Firefox leaks a lot of memory and I have to restart my browser so my computer won't run slow as molasses. It seems I was on juuuuuust the right page of Amazon that every time I rebooted, I was ordering another nose hair trimmer.

Yikes.

Why did it have to be nose hair trimmers? Why couldn't it be chocolate bars or something? What am I supposed to do with them? My bf and I are planning a Halloween party that we need some party favors/prizes for, but he already said "no" to the idea of giving them away as prizes. So now I'm thinking...well...Xmas IS just around the corner...